I’m not your flippin’ meme!

Camera phones are the best, aren’t they? We went from taking 24 pictures on a camera roll and praying that they come out to the immediate gratification of taking a thousand pictures a day and hoarding them obsessively until we download them onto a flash drive at your son-in-law’s advice.

Oh, wait. Was that a little too specific, mom? Oooops.

In any case, our ability to document anything we see is nothing short of amazing now. People take pictures of the most random stuff. Combined with the speed of the internet, anyone can see what we see anywhere at anytime within minutes. Seconds, even. With social media, they can even know our thoughts on it and make their own opinions known.

Here’s the bad news….people can be incredibly ignorant about what they are seeing. When you combine that, the picture-sharing craze, and the popularity of memes, you have a perfect recipe for ableistic nightmares that cause nothing but harm to the disabled community. (I don’t know if ableistic is a word, but I’m creating it if it’s not.) We’ve all seen them. People on Facebook share pictures of the disabled as jokes all the time. The one where someone using the electric cart at Walmart is standing, saying “It’s a miracle!” Someone getting out of a car without a wheelchair in disabled parking, and the quote has something along the lines of “Must have forgotten their wheelchair!”

My personal favorite (all sarcasm intended) is the one where someone took a picture of a woman’s feet from under the bathroom stall. The feet are swollen and misshapen. They wondered if it was a human or a werewolf. Guess what? That’s what my feet look like. I’m not a werewolf, just in case you’re wondering. The woman probably has Rheumatoid Disease, like me. One of the side effects is deformed feet and hands.

That’s what my feet look like. And my disease is not your flippin’ meme.

It’s not funny, and laughing at them makes you a jerk. I say this unapologetically. You don’t have to stay a jerk. You just need to think about your actions. I’m hoping that people lack information, and I’m going to give you some right now.

Why is it that as a society we know better than to laugh at the person in the wheelchair, or on a cane, or has some type of deformation? Mostly because our mommas taught us better, that’s why. My momma would have slapped me into next week, and I would have deserved it. But angry moms aside, we know instinctively that it is unacceptable behavior to cause pain towards another person. If someone made fun of a disabled person in public, then so many people would instantly be all over them that they probably wouldn’t be allowed to show their face around town again.

The advent of the internet has allowed people to be keyboard warriors and anonymous jerks. What is unacceptable behavior in public seems to be fair game when you are hiding behind a computer screen, and that is despicable. When you combine this with misinformation about the disabled community, you get these disgusting memes. So let’s talk about the memes a second. First, the lady in the cart standing? Maybe she’s like me. Maybe she got fat off prednisone to control her disease. Maybe she was athletic in what seems to be a lifetime ago. Maybe her thyroid went nuts. (It does happen, you know.) The wheelchair user that stood up, and you called them a faker? Many wheelchair users have some degree of mobility. Some can’t walk, some can’t walk far. Some can walk far, but it’s incredibly painful to do so. Many are like me, and have varying abilities on different days, depending on pain level. Perhaps the lady in disabled parking is a cancer survivor who lost a chunk of her leg. Maybe she has a spinal issue. Maybe he has COPD or heart problems. Maybe their pants are covering up an artificial leg.

Does anyone actually think that we are so lazy that we want to call attention to ourselves with canes, walkers, and wheelchairs? Do you think we want people following us around, making us into memes for laughs at our expense as we try to live a normal life? Mobility devices are a royal pain in the butt!!! However, mobility devices allow us to live the lives we want to lead, and we are grateful for them. The least able-bodied people can do is support us, give us access to daily life, and not make a flippin’ meme out of us.

I have heard all the excuses. “But they need to walk and lose weight! How do you know they aren’t faking it? Exercise is healthy! Too many people steal their grandmother’s disabled tag for close parking spots!” Let me lay one fact on you, right now. One that drowns out all the excuses. The only fact that matters.

YOU DON’T KNOW.

You don’t know. You have not walked a mile in their shoes. You don’t know their struggles. You don’t know their pain. You are not in their bodies. You don’t know what disease they have. You didn’t suffer the accident they did. You are not their doctor. You are not even their caretaker. Consider this: many disabilities come with the side effect of depression and suicidal thoughts. Do you want to take the chance on being morally responsible for someone’s death? You are not privy to their mental health.

YOU DON’T KNOW.

Now that we’ve established this, let’s talk about what you do know. You know that if you were in their shoes, you’d feel awful about finding yourself as a meme. You know that you should treat each other with respect and courtesy. You know that you may not want to walk a mile in their shoes. Anyone can become disabled, at any time. It only takes one disease. One rainstorm that causes you to hydro. One drunk driver. One mistake. Then you are subject to become someone’s joke, someone’s meme. Jesus taught us to treat others as you want to be treated. These teachings are wise words, even if you are not religious. Let’s strive to do that. Speak out against these memes when you see them. Don’t share them. Be informed.

Be better.