Religious views are my own.
I think I’m going to take the subject away from RD for a minute, and tell you about the strongest man I ever knew. I want to talk about my Uncle Ricky.
My Uncle Ricky was most certainly one of the goofiest men I ever met. He loved children. We knew that if he asked for a bite of our candy, we should probably decline. His bites…were….huge……But if he managed to sucker us into it, he had a spare snack for us after we stared in horror at our missing snack long enough. He was also a strong man. He worked with my Uncle Bobby in construction until his health didn’t allow for it anymore. (Matter of fact, I’m fairly sure Uncle Ricky and Uncle Bobby were partners in crime. Alot.) He lived next door to my grandparents. Every time I spent the night, I woke up at “oh-my-goodness” early to find him, my Uncle Bobby, and my Grandpa reading the paper and talking in the kitchen. I thought they were nuts for waking up that early. I talked to him and other veteran uncles extensively before I left for the Navy, and later as a disabled vet navigating the VA system for the first time. I remember the first time I had to go out to the VA. He and my Uncle Bobby, both Vietnam vets, were horrified that their niece had to go all the way to Almeda and Holcombe. They had sent me off to the Navy, I traveled the world…I drove across the country all the time..and they were horrified that I had to drive to Houston from Splendora. A whole 40 miles. It cracked me up.
He was such a strong man with such joy in life. That’s remarkable in anyone, but my Uncle Ricky was incredible in that regard. He had horrible sleep apnea. His snoring once woke me up when I was spending the night with my Granny, in the next house over. ( I’m not sure how my Aunt Judy dealt with that!!!) At 44 years old, he had a massive heart attack that sent his health spiraling downward, since the sleep apnea had weakened his heart. He almost died that day.
Uncle Ricky’s health continued to deteriorate, but I don’t actually remember all the details. I know he was diabetic, had COPD, a hernia, and wore a trach. He was hospitalized for various health issues so much that I’m sure there’s a hospital ward named after him somewhere. It was at least a couple of times a year. I think the amount of heart attacks he survived is actually still a topic up for debate. I’m sure his kids and Aunt Judy know. I’m thinking something like 6, but since I left home at 18 and only came back shortly before his death, I’m not sure. But that’s actually not the important part of this. The important part, the one I hope that I and all his kids, grandchildren, nieces and nephews inherited, was his fight and his joy of living. These health issues didn’t seem to get him down. He lived for his family and was an inspiration to us all. Every time I saw him, he was in a good mood and laughing. I pray that I and everyone else with chronic illnesses can face battles with a quarter of his bravery and joy.
Five years ago today, my Uncle Ricky won his battles and went to Paradise. I know it’s weird that I say he won. He never lost a single health battle. We all have to die, so that’s not a loss at all. That someone with all of those health issues lived to be in his 70’s is an amazing thing to me. His life was a series of victories over his health, and now he is at peace.
It was surreal learning about his death. My mom called me at camp, where I was volunteering as a cook. It stunned me. Poppa took me a ways in the woods and let me sob my heart out on his shoulder so my younger cousins wouldn’t find out that way. His family took over cooking duties for me and Courtney so we could go be with our family. You would think that with all of his health issues, that we would just be awaiting the call at that point. But after a gazillion heart attacks and lung issues, all I could feel beyond tears was actual astonishment that he was really gone. I remember thinking “Are you serious?!?!” When I was on the phone with mom. At this point, I was pretty sure he was invincible.
My Uncle Ricky, contrary to appearance, didn’t have a weak heart. Sure, it kept having attacks and putting him in the hospital. But he never let that stop him from enjoying life, enjoying his family, his children, and his grandkids. He loved with all of that strong heart. When he was done, he went on to a well-deserved reward. I pray we can all face our battles, chronic illness or others, with the courage and strength of Uncle Ricky.
Unapologetically Disabled 